The Tattle Tale
THE WAKE GOSSIP COLUMN
BY: OLIVIA HINES
April 25, 2022Hey guys, gals, and nonbinary pals! Some crazy things happened on the playground today, and of course, your favorite tattletale is here to tell all the secrets.
Looks like Cupid’s arrow has struck again. “Ms. Popular,” Penny Wiseman, has moved on from her latest boyfriend, Stevie Fergus. Last week, the now ex-couple was happily playing foursquare, but now Penny is with none other than the playground’s cutest boy—Tyler Jordan. The new “it” couple was recently caught holding hands under the slides!
Of course, love isn’t just for Penny and Tyler. Our favorite girl power duo, Stacy and Macy, became sudden frenemies during our fabulous field trip to the zoo. For three whole days, everyone found the pair on opposite sides of the playground, instead of playing side-by-side as usual! But today, the two have finally made up, with each wearing a fabulous array of colorful beaded friendship bracelets and necklaces.
In another fascinating piece of gossip, it appears Billy Shcender has finally met his match. The playground's infamous bully has been terrorizing our sandbox for far too long. However, it seems his newest and most favorite victim, Shane Paulson, who Billy’s been bullying for the last two weeks, has caused the tables to turn. We all know that Billy cannot refuse a dare, especially a triple-dog-dare. From my sources, I’ve heard that Shane dared Billy to do a cherry bomb off the monkey bars ten times, and Billy did, only to break his arm the tenth time. He was sent to the nurse’s office, where he cried for his mom, and later, an ambulance drove him to the hospital. With his reputation ruined, our playground’s bully is out of commission. Who will take his place?
I hope today’s gossip has filled your cup, but don’t worry, friends, I’ll be back tomorrow!